Carol F. McKibben
  • Home
  • About Carol
    • Services >
      • Clients
      • Testimonials
    • Contact
  • Books
    • Luke's Tale
    • Caddy's Tale
    • Snow Blood: Season 1
    • Snow Blood: A Vampire Mystery Thriller - Season 2
    • Snow Blood: A Vampire Mystery Thriller - Season 3
    • Snow Blood: Season 4 (A Vampire Mystery Thriller)
    • Snow Blood: Season 5 (A Vampire Mystery Thriller)
    • Kane: The First Blood Son
    • Moon Blood: Book 1
    • Moon Blood Book 2
    • Moon Blood Book 3
    • Moon Blood Book 4
    • Moon Blood Book 5
    • Reign - The Assault of Lucifer Morningstar - Book 1 Silver Blood Knight Series
    • Reign - The Rise of the Lich
    • Riding Through It
    • Media Kits
  • Free eBook
  • Blog
  • Reign - The Assault of Lucifer Morningstar - Book 1 Silver Blood Knight Series

Riding Through It

There's an expression that horse trainers use whenever a client's ride becomes difficult - "Keep riding through it." I've heard it at least a hundred times while riding my horse. It's a function of good horsemanship. If you give up or get off in the midst of difficulties, you might win the battle that day but lose the war in the long run. Learning to be really good at something takes persistence and time. Such it is with life; so it is with writing.

My Books

Are You Sending the Wrong Message?

7/24/2013

 
Picture
Do you ever get confusing email or text messages? I do. All the time. Which necessitates that I send a response asking for clarification. Sometimes the reply is clear to me. Sometimes it isn't. So, I spend more time trying to get at the root of what the person wants.

That's particularly bad since we live in the digital era. I can't remember the last time I actually got a hard copy letter through the mail. All that means is that most of our written communication today is through email and text.

Unfortunately, I can not see your face or hear your tone of voice when you send an email or text to me. Just this morning I received an email with a tone that implied the sender was aggravated with me. I quickly sent a response to apologize for any wrong-doing. The reply that came later explained that everything was fine with me but that she was just very busy and having a tough morning. If we funnel our bad moods, frustration and rush-rush work style into most of our correspondence imagine the damage we're doing to our reputations.

With that in mind, here's some advice that might help.
  • Slow down.Don't be in such a rush to crank out your work quickly.
  • When you are writing emails and texts, think through what you are going to say before you write it.
  • Re-read what you've written for typos and tone of voice. Do you come off angry? If you do, back up and start over.
  • Keep your writing simple. Don't write long, convoluted, run-on sentences with tons of commas and semicolons. Keep your sentences short and to the point.
  • Don't ask for responses to more than three items in one message.
  • Be considerate of the feelings of the person to whom you are addressing your message. In other words, be polite. Even if you have to deliver bad news, do it in a gentle, respectful way.
  • Think about the fact that the world doesn't evolve around you alone. You can get what  you want without being rude.

We're all guilty of sending the wrong messages about ourselves. It's mostly through thoughtlessness.

Action Item:
Think about this before you write you next message.

Til next time!
Carol

Just Be Present

7/16/2013

 
Picture
I sat with a blank page in front of me and wondered what I wanted to say to you. To find inspiration, I scrolled Facebook of all places and found this photograph. I knew in that instant what I needed to tell you.

In Luke's Tale, my heroic dog is Ashlundt's constant companion, aiding the man to come to grips with his loved one's illness. Then, later, he is Sara's constant companion after another tragedy strikes.

I know whenever I have been sick or stressed, the real Luke, and now my current dogs, just snuggled up next to me. Just knowing that they were there for me makes all the difference in the world.

Oftentimes when tragedy strikes our friends or family members, we don't know what to do. The simple answer is to just be present for them. And love them.

Often, that simple act is too difficult for people. They tell themselves they can't bear to watch people they love suffer, be ill or go through challenging times. That is selfish and unkind. The fact of the matter is that being present for them will give them the courage they need to fight their battles.

So just be present for those you love when they need you. No words necessary. A simple shoulder will do.

Til next time.
Carol


No Tears in the Writer; No Tears in the Reader

7/9/2013

 
Picture
I'll admit it. Out of more than 40 reviews, I received one bad one. You can't win the hearts and minds of everyone, but I have to admit, this one hurt.

Here's what got to me. Nothing else phased me until I got to this comment. "I really resented the mawkish sentiment which had me crying so often. That’s a lousy trick to play on your readers."

What? As a writer I'm not allowed to make you cry? I was crying when I wrote it! Robert Frost once said, " No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader."

Did I intend to purposely provide mawkish sentiment and play a lousy trick on my readers. NO! I wanted my readers to feel! In order to get across any message, I needed to make my readers feel the pain of my characters. And to feel my pain.

The purpose of any writing is to elicit a feeling that causes a response. Often, the experiences of the reader block those feelings, causing the resentment expressed in the critic's quote. Have we not all loved and lost? Do we not talk about it or write about it because it causes too much pain? Doesn't that pain have to come out before it can heal?

I would love to know what you think? When you read a book that causes you discomfort or makes you cry or makes  you think about something that needs to be discussed, do you resent it?

Action Item
Think about my question and let me know your thoughts.

Til next time!

    Author

    Carol McKibben

    Archives

    March 2025
    January 2025
    November 2024
    September 2024
    July 2024
    May 2024
    November 2023
    July 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    January 2023
    October 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013

    Categories

    All
    Belief In Self
    How To Get What You Want
    How To Love Unconditionally
    Inspiration
    Just For Fun
    Moon Blood
    On Writing
    Snow Blood
    Things You Should Know About Luke's Tale
    Virtual Book Tour
    Words Of Wisdom
    Writing For A Living

    RSS Feed

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner