Carol F. McKibben
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  • Reign - The Assault of Lucifer Morningstar - Book 1 Silver Blood Knight Series

Riding Through It

There's an expression that horse trainers use whenever a client's ride becomes difficult - "Keep riding through it." I've heard it at least a hundred times while riding my horse. It's a function of good horsemanship. If you give up or get off in the midst of difficulties, you might win the battle that day but lose the war in the long run. Learning to be really good at something takes persistence and time. Such it is with life; so it is with writing.

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The Power of Silence

5/29/2014

 
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I love this blog. It was written by my dear friend and associate, Andrea Michaels. I wanted to share it with you because it is applicable not just in business but in relationships and how you deal with others. Enjoy!

I love stories. I love allegories. I love “examples.” So here’s an example for you to think about that is somewhat crass but leads into deeper thoughts, so don’t give up when you start reading.


Have you ever negotiated with a car salesman? Have you ever walked away from that negotiation knowing that you’ve “won”? That you have reached the optimal deal? Or is it an exasperating back and forth that makes you want to flee?

Many years ago, a sage associate gave me a piece of advice I’ll never forget. He said, “Put your best deal forth and then shut up. Say nothing further.” The salesman will keep talking and counter-offering, so say nothing. He will be uncomfortable and keep lowering his price. Say nothing until your goal is reached, and it will be if you keep quiet. Because the person who sits comfortably and stares at his or her “opponent” and says absolutely nothing holds the power in a negotiation.

Know Your Value and Keep Quiet
We are all accustomed to talking, and virtually talking ourselves into corners. We get defensive when we hear objections to our offerings. Take another example. When a client says, “You are expensive,” smile and say “yes.” And be comfortable with that response. You do not need to justify or defend, and you most certainly don’t need to rush into lowering your price. Know your value and keep quiet.

So what happens when you don’t talk? You listen. And by listening, you learn. Most of us deal with some degree of narcissism and thus keep talking, filling every empty space with the sound of our words, most of which are not needed. Business is not about monologues; it is about dialogues, and sharing information and communicating for mutual understanding Do you agree?

How many times have you learned what your client wanted of you or what a vendor needed from you if you were talking “at” them instead of “with” them, eagerly listening to gather information?

Silence is a beautiful thing. Pay attention to it and see what benefits it reaps.

Andrea Michaels is the founder and president of Extraordinary Events and the author of Reflections of a Successful Wallflower – Lessons in Business; Lessons in Life. She may be reached via [email protected].



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Rules for a Great Relationship

5/20/2014

 
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These "rules" are by no means original. And there's room for many more of them. I wanted to share them with you. They've helped me maintain a 40-year relationship with two children and multiple dogs and horses.

1. Say "I love  you" often.

2. Flirt and laugh together.

3. Communicate! If one of you  likes to play the turtle, then the other needs to pull him/her out of the shell.

4. Never stop dating.

5.Always compliment.

6. Listen, really listen.

7. Say "thank you."

8. Hug. Hold hands. Kiss.

9. RESPECT and encourage each other.

10. Never go to bed angry with each other. You'll be miserable if you do.

11. Don't bring up touchy topics that need longer discussions at bedtime. You'll be up all night!


12. Adverse to popular belief, don't marry someone thinking he/she will not change. They often do, and not in the way you might think.
Don't be afraid to discuss your concerns, but do it in a loving, gentle way.

Remember to love each other without "conditions." Ride through the tough times. Know that things can and will change. They always do - both the bad and the good. If you make a commitment to a relationship, when it is tested, don't run away from it. Stick to it. It won't be easy. This isn't about easy. Commitments never are!

Til Next Time!
Carol




Time to Let Go Available Now!

5/14/2014

 
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This amazing, touching story is now available at Amazon. It already has 14 5-star Reviews!

Time to Let Go is a contemporary family drama set in Britain. Following a traumatic incident at work Stewardess Hanna Korhonen decides to take time off work and leaves her home in London to spend quality time with her elderly parents in rural England. There she finds that neither can she run away from her problems, nor does her family provide the easy getaway place that she has hoped for. Her mother suffers from Alzheimers' disease and, while being confronted with the consequences of her issues at work, she and her entire family are forced to reassess their lives. The book takes a close look at family dynamics and at human nature in a time of a crisis. Their challenges, individual and shared, take the Korhonens on a journey of self-discovery and redemption.

Grab it today! Highly recommended!

Interview with a Master

5/12/2014

 
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My publisher just sent out a post that I thought so clever that I had to share it with you. This is from Troll River Publications. If this doesn't get the creative juices flowing (whether you are a writer, entrepreneur or otherwise), it should.

Here's the post:

One of my authors pointed this out to me, and I have to agree with her:

Interview with a Master author, Jason Luke, did the MOST brilliant thing I’ve seen in a long time. For several weeks, he appeared on Facebook pages (groups) and wrote live scenes based on the suggestions of readers -- scenes that used characters from his book. At the end of the Facebook tour, he had 30 brand new scenes that he then posted, one at a time, thanking each group. THEN, he put them together into an e-book for readers waiting for him to write his sequel. How brilliant was THAT?

And before you think he had a following..."Interview with a Master" was his debut novel. Very interesting stuff!

ACTION ITEM: What creative ideas does this give you?

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