Carol F. McKibben
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Riding Through It

There's an expression that horse trainers use whenever a client's ride becomes difficult - "Keep riding through it." I've heard it at least a hundred times while riding my horse. It's a function of good horsemanship. If you give up or get off in the midst of difficulties, you might win the battle that day but lose the war in the long run. Learning to be really good at something takes persistence and time. Such it is with life; so it is with writing.

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Loyalty in a Relationship

11/21/2013

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According to the AskMen.com Great Male Survey 2009 Edition and Yahoo! Shine Great Female Survey 2009 Edition, a sense of loyalty is the most important personality trait making a man/woman “relationship material.” For men, a sense of loyalty (32%) outranked a sense of caring/nurturing (24%) and intelligence (21%). For women, loyalty (34%) outranked nurturing (31%), a sense of humor (22%), and intelligence (10%).  (Source: examiner.com)

By definition, loyalty is faithfulness or devotion to a person or other entity. Because we live in a world where selfishness seems to be the norm, one of the most honorable characteristic a person should develop is loyalty, for loved ones, an organization or job.

I went looking online for the qualities of being a loyal person and found them at  http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Loyal. I wanted to share them with you because I think loyalty is a vital component to any relationship, as proven by the statistics above.

1.      Understand what being loyal means. You must be willing to allow your own interests to take second place to be truly loyal to another person or cause. Loyalty is simply the act of putting someone or something else ahead of self.

2.      Be willing to sacrifice. Being loyal in a patriot sense, as in loyal to one's country, has placed millions in harm's way in wars throughout history. The people who serve in the modern military are loyal to their nation, its flag, and the purpose they serve for. Being loyal to a friend or your own family can also require sacrifice.

3.      Take time to look at the needs of whomever will have your loyalty. To take steps of loyalty, you need to recognize that it is a deliberate effort, and to be truly loyal to someone, you have to be willing to invest yourself, your time and energy in them.

4.      Ask yourself if what or who you are offering your loyalty to is worthy of the investment. Is the person or organization who asks for your loyalty worthwhile? Depending on what philosophy or religion you may follow, you might find guidance there. In the Judeo-Christian religion, the order of loyalty may be summed up as "God, Family, and Country," putting loyalty to God first, then family, and finally, country.

5.      Consider the benefits of loyalty. This may be most obvious in the case of employment. Being a loyal employee often creates its own rewards, with increases in pay, job security, and respect from your employer. Being a loyal employer, who is willing to look after your employees, will give them incentive to be more dedicated and productive for you.

But what are the benefits of being loyal to another person, even when it means standing alone with that person? When it is detrimental to you, it’s important to weigh the risks. As in the case of Luke’s Tale, Luke was loyal to Ashlundt and Sara, no matter what the circumstances. Luke is a pure example of loyalty backed up by unconditional love.

What are your thoughts on loyalty? Til next time,

Carol


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